Saturday, September 30, 2006

Okay, so I didn't give in

but I sure wanted to.

Yesterday: We're finishing up some errands when Em's plaintive voice calls from the back of the van. It's a guileless voice, small and full of being four years old.

"Mom?" he says. "When we're all done can we go to the pet shop? Because I want to get a kitty."

I'm allergic to cats, on top of which we've got more than our share of chaos, noise, and mess as it is...so a pet is not in anyone's near future.

Still, I found myself battling the inexplicable urge to buy a kitty.

Why I’m grateful

for my husband:

1. I have severe tendencies toward cynicism, arrogance, self-absorbancy, obstinateness. And yet he’s still here.
2. Not only does he not mind when I borrow his Hawaiian-print boxer shorts, he thinks it’s cute. Or maybe this is just what he tells himself so he won’t mind. Hmmmn.
3. He buys me chocolate. (This is a critical quality in a spouse.)
4. He loves God.
5. He loves me.
6. He loves our kids.
7. He’s kind. And he’s mellow. And that might seem like a silly thing, but compared to the harsh brutality in which many people exist, this is huge.
8. He’s got the longest eyelashes I’ve ever seen, with the perfect amount of curve. No wait, that’s what annoys me about him. Sorry, wrong list.
9. He’s blind in the most endearing of ways. As in he thinks I’m hot, in spite of the fact that I’m, well, me.
10. He also thinks I’m smart and funny. Or maybe he just lets me think he thinks I’m smart and funny. In any case, he doesn’t seem to mind that I over-analyze everything.
11. He loads the dishwasher at night. And he shows up when he says he will. And he’s a natural in the spotlight. And a jillion other things, but I’m liking the number eleven today so we'll end here.


Which is why.

Friday, September 29, 2006

The list

okey dokey artichokey, for those of you who have pleaded with me to furnish some b-day ideas for the lil Elle, your wish is granted:

Here's a bunch of stuff Elle wants. Okay, so it's really stuff I want. But she will like it too, promise.

1. Is this growth chart not insanely cute? And it would look simply smashing against the olive paint on her walls...

2. And perhaps one of everything from this gorgeous store. Or at least these hair clips or any of these whimsical jewelry cases. Sublime.

3. If you've never shopped Oompa, you've got to check them out. I'm especially fond of their plush toy selection (because Elle is SO lacking in the stuffed animal department LOL), namely this funny fellow, and this here chicken, although now that I look at them, they're kind of expensive. But Elle makes the cutest chicken noises if that helps justify the cost any. ;)

(Not for gifting purposes, but while you're in the neighborhood take a look-see at this delightful wall-art collection. I'm a-thinkin' I might need to bust out those paint brushes again...)

4. And then there are books. Elle loves books. I love books. And board books are especially perfect, with their sturdy, Elle-proof pages. Check these out:

Good ol' Olivia

More More More

anything by Leslie Patricelli

Oh Elle! I mean Oh David!

And the most addicting dog book ever


So there ya go. :) Happy browsing!

PS Kindra, your baby is destined to receive the best gifts ever, 'cause after all my practice I am seriously an expert kid-gifter. If I do say so myself. heehee

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Me

The idea of servitude is counter-cultural to Americans. To the human race, perhaps, but especially Americans. We are a me-first, claw-my-way-to-the-top, look-out-for-myself-'cause-no-one-else-will society to the core.

So if/when we open our Bibles and scan a verse talking about valuing the needs of other people, about dying to ourselves, we think, "Ha ha, Jesus, that's a good one. But seriously, now."

But I think he knew a thing or two about serving.



"When Jesus washed the disciples' feet, he taught them a final lesson about serving. Two of those feet belonged to Judas.

Judas Iscariot.

Just saying the name leaves a bitter aftertaste on the tongue. For it is a name synonymous with the most treacherous of betrayals--the betrayal of a friend."
(Ken Gire)

"It has been said that forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that crushed it. Could there be a fragrance as sweet in all the world as that of Jesus having washed the very heel that was poised to crush him?" (again, Ken Gire)


And then, of course, he also died to benefit the very people who were killing him.

So he modeled not only general servitude, but also serving those who despise you, even when the personal cost is overwhelming. I don't know about you, but I have a hard time with that one.

It's like swimming upstream, and I don't mean going against the crowd. I mean struggling against the inclination of every cell in my body.

I penned (okay, keyed...but "penned" reads so much better, don't you think?) this bit last night, in reference to this dying to self principle:

It’s that hour when dusk falls down, settles in the cracks like ash, scatters the light from the air. It’s a somber time, the pause after sunset’s explosion, with leftover color sinking through the earth.

Melancholy.

That sad smear of resignation that comes when you’ve done all your trying, and it just isn’t working. I’ve tried.

I really have.

But tomorrow will bring the sun back, and I’ll try yet again.

A sneak peek

...at my next ensemble:



Love those harvest hues!!

Monday, September 25, 2006

Simple pleasures

Mondays are for walking with someone you like, someone just the right size for hand-holding, who won't get too far ahead of you.



Makes you smile a little, doesn't it?



And then there's this flawless lil apple ensemble crafted by my friend Whitney, a maven at classic designs. Love her!

Sunday, September 24, 2006

When I grow up

I'm a small group leader of a bunch of teenage girls, and I tell you what: they can make me crazy, but I love them with a fierceness too wide to wrap words around.

A few weeks back, one of our discussion topics went something like, "Describe your dream job." And they all took turns interrupting each other with grandiose future plans.

I didn't share mine, of course, because they think I'm all grown up and should be able to mark this topic "NA," but here's what I was thinking.

My dream is to go to med school, practice pediatrics for a few years to pay off the school bills, then set up pro-bono medical care clinics in the most desperate reaches of the earth--East Timor, maybe, or Somalia. And forty years down the line I'd retire to a cabin ensconced in curls of woodsmoke, and write it all down.

So there you go. Nothing terribly romantic, no wild success or lofty prestige, but I think this dream fits me quite nicely.

Someday.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Because it's Friday and all

Twenty Ways to Maintain (In)sanity
(A smidgen of hilarity passed on by my friend Kris Craft.)



1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "In."

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For Smuggling Diamonds."

7. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."

8. Dont use any punctuation

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat. Keep a serious face.

11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, "Rock Bottom."

17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream, "I Won! I Won!"

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!!"

19. Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

20. And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity...



(Addendum: So it turns out there was actually supposed to be a #20 and it just got cut off in her email, but it's so much more appropriate this way. Heheh...)

Give a girl a mirror...



Who knew brushing teeth could be so much fun?

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Wealth





At some point they may realize that they'd have more in the way of a wardrobe and a college fund if we'd had fewer in the way of offspring. Or maybe this won't ever cross their minds. Maybe they'll just always know, intuitively, that they're so much richer for having each other.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Water Fowl

I’m not convinced you can say you have truly lived, till you’ve played a few rounds of Duck-Duck-Goose with Em and Elle.

It began while I was on the phone with a friend, discussing details of some graphic design work she’s roped me into I cheerily volunteered for.

Em’s at my side. “Can we play Duck-Duck-Goose, Mom?”

I hold up my palm. Wait.

So of course, the rest of the phone call is interrupted at twenty second intervals by:

“Now, Mom?”

“Can we play now?”

“How ‘bout now?”

About thirty-six interruptions later I hang up the phone, and Em’s eyes brighten in my most favorite of ways. “I want to be the ducker!” he calls.

Our Duck-Duck-Goose skills could use a bit of polishing, but we’re getting the hang of it. We can usually convince at least one person to sit down, and even Elle has mastered the fine art of smacking someone’s head with the accompanying, “Dut” or “Doose.” And then of course, most of the game is spent with everyone running around in personal orbits, eventually plopping down when the moment seems right. It’s a jolly good bunch of fun.

And since we’re discussing how cute my kids are (you didn’t know we were discussing this, but I’m sneaky like that), Elle is the cutest walker-down-the-haller I’ve ever laid eyes on. She does it differently each time, sometimes with a good dose of arm-swing, sometimes humming and up on her tippy-toes, sometimes in that half-squatting sumo-wrestler walk. We’ve got a whole lot of hall in our house, so the cuteness goes on for a while. My advice to all the mom-to-be’s: Get a good length of hall. It’s sure to do wonders for your kid’s cuteness quotient.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Temporary Lapse

A decade ago, The Harvard University Gazette ran an article debunking the theory that aging adults lose oodles of brain cells daily (okay, so they didn't say "oodles," but it's such a fun word; they really should have). It was a fascinating piece that I mostly didn't read. William J. Cromie concludes the article with this cheery news: "You can feel good about the fact that you're not losing your mind at the rate of thousands of brain cells every day."

Well, I, for one, beg to differ.

My memory is shot, has positively gone-to-pieces, is now a muddled blur of a thing that I no longer trust. I am sure of this because any self-respecting neuron left in my brain would have reminded me of my affection for all-things-Pooh during my recent seven-day series on "What I Love."





And for certain, some kind soul wants to jump in at this point and console, "But look, you did remember. Just a bit belated is all." Which is sweet of you, thanks a bunch, but the thing is that it's not so much I remembered as it is that someone else brought it up.

But however it is we got here, I now recall that I'd like to share a bit of Pooh simpleness with you. So here we go.




Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.

"Pooh!" he whispered.

"Yes, Piglet?"

"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw. "I just wanted to be sure of you."



There now; I feel enormously better. And now that I've been reminded, I shan't forget again. Hopefully. Perhaps.

Hmmmmn.

I'm sorry; what were we talking about again?

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Go with the pink

In The Secret Life of Bees, August Boatwright is a woman of considerable class and intelligence; a woman who, nonetheless, paints her house Caribbean Pink.

Never mind that it’s the most garish shade of paint she’s ever seen.

Never mind that half the town will talk.

She paints with shocking pink because her sister May has picked it. May, who crumbles beneath a world’s worth of suffering. 'Cause if it’ll lift May’s spirit, August reasons, it’s a good choice of paint.

Midway through the story, the book’s teenage protagonist, Lily, asks August about the unexpected hue. And following the explanation, August starts to add: “The problem with most people--”

But Lily interrupts, supplying, “--is that they don’t know what matters and what doesn’t.” She’s proud of herself, assuming she has completed August’s thought. She’s wrong.

August clarifies that what she was going to say is this: “The problem with most people is that they know what matters, but they don’t choose it.” She knows that May’s well-being is vastly more important than painting the house a reasonable color. But still, she confesses, it was hard to go with the pink.


I find this maxim at work in my life, too. It’s hard to go with the pink.

I know it’s the littlest things that end up mattering. Building train tracks with Em when I’m wilted from exhaustion. Letting Elle crack an egg for the batter, even if it sends me fishing out bits of the shell. Stopping my work at the sewing machine to look at Bee or Zee when they talk, to hear the heart veiled within the words, to listen. But these are such little things, really, so easy to not do. Yet all these bits collect, add up to form the people my children will become.

So I’m working on it, practicing this choosing-that-which-matters, trying to value the valuable and set the rest at the curb. Never mind the inconvenience. Caribbean Pink it is.

Friday, September 15, 2006

Pieces

Whenever some gal at church arranges a newborn in my arms, the same two thoughts seize my brain, unbidden.

First: What if I break it? This is a ridiculous thought for the mom of four children, but still it’s there.

And clipping at the heels of thought numero uno comes this one: I have absolutely no recollection of my children at this age. Not even a skinny shred of memory.

So every once in a while I like to transcribe a bit of who my kids are right now, because as deeply as I’ve memorized them, I’m apt to blink ten years from now and not remember this child at all.

Yesterday Em and I went for a walk. My, that boy can talk. He’s got this smile so infectious that, even when he’s a whole bunch of sweaty kid, you just want to squeeze him. He was telling me that Daddy said not to get lost, and he said he won’t get lost but if he does maybe someone will find him. It was an adorable conversation, one I didn’t entirely follow, but that worked out okay since it was coming along nicely with very little input from me.

Elle’s birthday is a few weeks away. Someone needs to tell her she’s not yet two. She’s got the arm-crossing, hmmph-ing thing going on in earnest, and she bops on down the hall like she owns the place. She’s quite accomplished at reaming out her brothers with a bunch of angry pointing and indecipherable syllables peppered with the word no. Nobody knows exactly what she’s saying, but we get the point. Today she felt the need to argue with Em, so she held onto my arm and told him, “My mommy! Mine!” which Em found wildly funny.

Zee made a Lego sword this morning, then ran to the couch wailing when his little brother smashed it with a sword of his own. A few minutes later, he emerged from the bathroom with a self-applied toilet paper bandage around his hand. (I did try, folks, but I wasn’t allowed to take a picture.) He’s got two wiggly teeth up front, leaning forward in a way that can give you the willies. Behind them are the permanent teeth growing in, but he braces at the mention of losing the little ones. He’s firmly opposed to blood.

Bee showed me around his school last night. He zips ahead, weaving through the crowd out of sight, but then hurries on back to be sure I’m not lost. Much of life—math, soccer, drawing, making friends—comes easily to him, so when he’s not good at something from the start, he thinks he can’t do it, doesn’t want to try. He’s in that big-little boy stage, on the brink of some serious growing up, which is exhilarating but also, for me at least, a bit sad. He’s still proud that his class has collected the most Box-Tops; his definition of “cool” is having his hair spiked—and I think, Just one day longer, please. Don’t let it end just yet.

So there you go. A few pieces of daily life, bits of nothing and everything.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

What I love: words

By now you’ve likely picked up on this, on my ardor for well-chosen words. You’re sharp like that. :)

This maxim pops up from time to time around our place: “Sticks and stones may break our bones, but words will break our hearts.” Which drives at a larger, deeper truth, I know--but also demonstrates the raw power of words, their ability to maim or heal. Their weight is impossible to overestimate.


So in celebration of my love for words, here’s a poem j’adore. Found it as a freshman in high school, but it’s still poignant, maybe even more so today.

“Love is not like that, is not like
that easiness-in-getting
along that they call
Love; it is not like that, is not
like that desiring-companionship that
they call love; it is not like that, is not
like that desiring-of-one-beautiful
that they call love; it is not like that.
When will they learn that love is not
like that?

Ask St. Valentine—he was beheaded
because of love; ask St. Francis—
call him a sissy, but he became
a beggar because of love; ask
all those who know and they’ll tell
you that
Love is not like that; ask Jesus Christ.”
--David DeBolt


So I’m thinking I’ll pull a switcheroo on that “Daily Groaner” in the right column...with my apologies to all who appreciate a good, dry joke (which is maybe all of one person: Kristin)...and let “Brain Fodder” take up residence instead.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

What I love: mes amis de la haute ecole

'Kay, so admittedly, I'm too far removed from my meager deux ans of high school French to know if that title is correct, but it's supposed to read "my high school friends."

Love those guys.

Emi: the friend who's constant. Our friendship began when my preschool self purportedly brought her a cup of juice after she jumped (fell? was pushed?) from the swing and broke her arm. I have no memory of my act of kindness, but she claims it's true, which is one reason I like her. To this day, she's the most likely to be there--to drop an email, to hang out when I fly home, to call on my birthday.

Karen: my twin in a whole lotta ways...just as stubborn as I am, for starters. Full of memorable one-liners and brilliantly caustic humor. I can't help but love her, especially when I think about her leaning over my lunch tray, fork poised in mid-air, eyeing my oranges while I talk on and on and on (some things don't change, eh?), asking, "You gonna eat that?" And yes, she's a skinny bit of a thing.

Gina: my kind of person. The one who loved blowing bubbles, who wore knee socks before the rest of us found out they were cool, who hollered warnings from a van window: "Don't eat my dog!" in not-the-best-part-of-town. Who strung vegetables into leis and played Power Rangers with me in the supermarket. (Sorry, White Ranger, the secret's out.)

I've been lucky enough to have seen them all in the past year, to witness that yes, they are still incredible people. But a sprig of sadness wends up through it all, too, for the quiet, unnamed space that slips between us. A casualty of time.

Which means I'm off to email them. Not so much to recapture the old bonds as to forge new ones, one conversation at a time.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

What I love: comfort

Mornings soggy and gray. Hot chocolate on the stove. Sweet crackers for dipping. Does it get any better than this?



And now for the recipe:

(Well, we'll get to the recipe, but first a warning. I don't quite do recipes. Recipes are for people who can be bothered by such trivialities as measuring, which seems like something a Type-A-er such as myself would do, but alas. This is one of my many contradictions.)

(Warning continued: I do sometimes measure things I think may be important, such as amounts of flour, but I never--and I do mean never--slide the knife across the top to get a level cup. So for all of you purists who are gasping at that, I suggest you stop reading here. It only gets worse.)

(More warning: so the joke at my house is if you like a particular dish, too bad. It will never taste this way again. I'm like the chef on television who pours oil directly from the bottle, commenting, "That's about two tablespoons," or the DIY guy on a show I once saw who said, "There's a saying, 'Measure twice, cut once.' I have a different saying. 'Close enough.'" This is me.)

Okay, so the recipe:

Milk
unsweetened baking chocolate, finely chopped
sugar
cinnamon sticks
whipped cream
miniature chocolate chips or sprinkles

Pour a bunch of milk into a heavy pan. The amount of milk, seriously, depends on how much you hot chocolate you want to make. I'd figure 1.5 cups per person, or 2.5 if you like to use those giant soup mugs. Whole milk tastes better, but skinny milk can work.

Heat the milk till frothy but not boiling. This probably translates to "Stir constantly over medium heat till frothy."

Add chocolate and sugar. I don't know how much of a chocoholic you are, but my mantra is: "The more the better." Stir till completely dissolved. If you, like me, rarely buy baking chocolate, use whatever kind you've got on hand. For us this generally means choc chips. (If you're using reg chocolate, don't add the sugar.)

Serve w/cinnamon sticks for stirring, plus a good dollop of whipped cream and some sprinkles.

I know, this recipe is largely useless, but it's how I do it. You're welcome.

Monday, September 11, 2006

What I love: Early sun

...the first brushes of dawn, with fingerlings of new sun just beginning to cup the earth, gaining color, trying themselves out.

Though I admit I’ve forgotten how to be a morning person and am rarely conscious during this display, but never mind that.

(Note the lack of an accompanying picture. The original idea was to get up at 6 and try a few dawn photos, but the problem, as it turned out, was that I also love a good book. So I was up till 2:38 finishing The Secret Life of Bees. Sorry.)

Sunday, September 10, 2006

What I love: Anyway

The late Mother Teresa's version of The Paradoxical Commandments:

"People are often unreasonable,
illogical and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind,
people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful,
you will win some false friends and true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank,
people may cheat you;
Be honest anyway.

What you spend years building,
someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness,
they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today,
people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have,
and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis,
it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway."

Saturday, September 09, 2006

What I love: Zee & soccer



Last year we cheered from the sidelines as Zee ran away from the ball.

Today, at his first game in the U-8 bracket, Zee spent the first half running parallel to the ball. A drastic improvement, but still the source of much hilarity.

Second half, though, he got in that muddle of legs several times, and gave the ball a good kick. He even stole it from an opposing player, and popped back up when someone leveled him (and it was a very illegal leveling at that).






So perhaps we've still got some hope for this lil soccer player.

Friday, September 08, 2006

What I love: S

Right, I totally stole this from Soulemama's blog, which makes it all the sweeter. A week's worth of things I love. Which is intended to give you seven insights into my soul or something. Hmmmn. I don't know what I'll love the next six days, but whatever it turns out to be, I wouldn't recommend reading very far into it.

So, what I love today:





Sidewalk chalk and September mornings and siblings who collaborate on masterpieces. And, apparently, things that start with "s."

More tomorrow. :)

Thursday, September 07, 2006

At a glance

When I first began teaching, all of us first years attended (by force) these insipid seminars and get-to-know-you deals. During one of those, we shared artwork we'd made about who we are; the following poem was the crux of my me-collage. So I guess this is a glimpse at what grips my heart, makes it beat. And makes it stop.

We Are Responsible
by Ina Hughes

"We are responsible
for children who put chocolate fingers everywhere,
who like to be tickled,
who stomp in puddles and ruin their pants,
who sneak popsicles before supper, who erase holes in math workbooks,
who can never find their shoes.

And we are responsible
for those who stare at photographers from behind barbed wires,
who can't bound down the street in a new pair of sneakers,
who never "counted potatoes,"
who are born in places we wouldn't be caught dead,
who never got to the circus,
who live in an x-rated world.

We are responsible
for children who give us sticky kisses and fistfuls of dandelions,
who sleep with the dog and bury goldfish,
who judge us in a hurry and forget their lunch money,
who cover themselves with Band-Aids and sing off-key,
who squeeze toothpaste all over the sink,
who slurp their soup.

And we are responsible
for those who never get dessert,
who have no safe blanket to drag behind them,
who watch their parents watch them die,
who can't find any bread to steal,
who don't have any rooms to clean up,
whose pictures aren't on anybody's dresser,
whose monsters are real.

We are responsible
for children who spend all their allowance before Tuesday,
who throw tantrums in the grocer store and pick at their food,
who like ghost stories,
who shove dirty clothes under the bed, and never rinse the tub,
who get visits from the tooth fairy,
who don't like to be kissed in front of the carpool,
who squirm in church and scream in the phone,
whose tears we sometimes laugh at and whose smiles can make us cry.

And we are responsible
for those whose nightmares come in the daytime,
who will eat anything,
who have never seen a dentist,
who aren't spoiled by anybody,
who go to bed hungry and cry themselves to sleep,
who live and move, but have no being.

We are responsible for children who want to be carried,
and for those who must.
For those we never give up on,
and for those who don't get a second chance.
For those we smother
...and for those who will grab the hand of anybody kind enough to offer it."



And I'm guessing that now you're all thinking the same thing I'm always told whenever I speak my passions for a few minutes: that I've missed my call to missions. Which may be true, but I'd like to think it's still coming.

After the arrival of several of my offspring, I sometimes feared it was coming. I dreamed about arriving in Africa, with the land shadowed and literally writhing with venomous snakes and spiders and crocodiles, and I was trying to hold all my children at once, to keep them from death. I woke with cold fear coursing through me.

But I've come to terms, since then, with what I already knew: that my children can die anywhere. They can suffer and die right here, in the safe midwest of safe, affluent North America, surrounded by the best hospitals and technology and surgeons. And that there are worse things than dying.

And that, ultimately, the safest place--the best place--to be is exactly where God wants you, doing exactly what he's asked you to do.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

enteros

So I haven't given away points for a while. Thought I'd better remedy that.

Twenty to Noel for concocting the most outlandish cow story I've ever read. (I'm not entirely sure he's related to me. I think he and my dad are both adopted, however that works out.)

Twenty to Aunty Carol for being one of the most generous people I know. (The serger arrived, yippeeee! And it's a beauty.)

Ten to Rob for linking to me on his blog. Time to replace that good ol' "Google News," eh? Plus, I was a little insulted that you linked to Slabaugh and not me, since, honestly, mine has to be funnier than Mark's. That is, until I read Mark's. And it was clever. Darnit.

Ten to me for giving this backlighting technique a whirl:





Fifteen to Uncle Kevin for being a quality science teacher and owning a volcano video so I could borrow it. Which reminds me, I suppose you're wanting it back, huh?

Twenty to Mom because, well, between raising Nate, Noel, and me, we can all see you deserve it.

And now I'm fresh out of generosity.

Monday, September 04, 2006

In celebration of Labor Day

I thought it might be mildly amusing to start a labor-related meme.

FIRST JOB: Classroom custodian, age 14 (the epitome of boring, but still a paid 90 minutes of solitude each afternoon).

WORST JOB: Greeter girl at Express, age 17. Time. Went. By. So. Slow. Ly.

SHORTEST LABOR: With Elle, about two hours from the time we arrived at the hospital. Although the contractions officially started about three months before that.

DREAM OCCUPATION: Ice Cream Tester. Speaking of which, I googled Ice Cream Tester just to see exactly who it is I'm coveting, and I happened across this personality test. Can't recommend it based on fun-quotient (questions were reminiscent of teen mag tests, uck), but here are my results:

CHERRY GARCIA!
You scored 70% SWEET, 59% CHUNKY, and 55% UNIQUE!
cherry sweet cream base with cherries and fudge chunks

Awesome...you are one of my personal favs: Cherry Garcia. You fall in the middle on all measurements- sweet, wild, and unique, but not overwhelmingly so on any of those. You make a good friend, able to share your unique perspectives on things, and able to have fun without winding up in jail or something. Good job.


(Not sure how I feel about having a chunky rating, but good to know I'm not likely to do a significant amount of jail time as I don't much like bright orange.)

OCCUPATIONS I'D LIKE TO TRY FOR ABOUT SIX MONTHS IF THIS WERE ECONOMICALLY FEASIBLE:
Cake decorator, lawyer (get paid to argue?!?! How sweet is that!), pro soccer player (although it would take them like 6 seconds to permanently bench me), potter, interior decorator, bakery owner (with a thick-glass display case of oversized cupcakes iced w/buttercream frosting and old-fashioned sprinkles), wedding planner (and as a bonus, maybe I could look like Jennifer Lopez for six months!! or not), architect, photographer.

Anyone else?

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Just add pixie dust

Ann Wood's airships are molded bits of artistic genius. Neverland, here we come...

Friday, September 01, 2006

faux zzzzz's



A cute but futile attempt to convince me that nap should happen in the living room.

(Me: "'Kay, guys, time for nap!"
Em: "But Mom, we already are taking a nap, see?"
Fake snoring by Elle in the background.)